Monday, April 25, 2011

Oh Bla Di Oh Bla Da Life Goes On...

So I recently made a bold statement how I love my new's true! Yes, it was incredibly difficult to leave my friends, and yes, it was super difficult to leave my coworkers, but YES, I AM REALLY HAPPY HERE!! At first, as expected, it was rough. After all, I moved to a random city where I only knew JD, and I had no girl friends or anyone to hang out with and was in the midst of undergoing a divorce. Ugh, what a nightmare! I quickly became depressed spending a lot of time alone in my sad apartment with Charlie Brown, who was also depressed. Didn't help the matter that we had to say goodbye to Miss Molly...not to mention that we left her with the evil one. Well, I've had some time away from Charleston and have tried to keep communication with my friends to a maximum and Sir Douche to a minimum (although difficult as we sort everything out) and am honest to goodness healing!


I obviously have many regrets looking back on my life. Getting involved with someone at such a young age, staying with him through the bad times, not dating, all those years I thought building towards creating a family with someone etc etc. I just assumed that we would be together forever and we could survive anything. Yes, I was young and naive. As it turns out, we just kept taking the next steps (engagement, marriage, blah blah) because it was what was supposed to happen next (ah hem I say we, but I mean he). I certainly didn't know anything else and was always along for the ride. I didn't follow through with a career path out of college because I knew I'd be moving around following Sir D with the Air Force assignments. I had no problem with this because I'd do anything for him, but it never gave me a chance to build much of a professional life for myself. My goal was to find work at each new base assignment for extra household income until the next move when I anticipated having kids and cutting back on work. That was my plan. Of course I didn't have a backup plan - why would I possibly need a backup plan?! Preposterous, indeed!! Well, that certainly backfired! I considered this new freedom as an opportunity to finally do whatever I want now. Then I had to be realistic for a hot second...hmmm....I've grown accustomed to a certain lifestyle over the years and I really don't think I can back my way down the social ladder to living in a shanty just so I can start getting back into the animal care/zookeeping industry where the money is crap. I decided to stick with what I've been doing and get another administrative job and work up the corporate ladder. I figure moving to a new city of MY (aka NOT the military) choice was empowering enough so I will stick to what I'm good at. I can always start volunteering on weekends...or get a pet lemur or something! :)

Looking back, the military lifestyle is so difficult. I never expected to be a part of that, and unfortunately was with Sir D waaayyy before that was even a possibility, so I had no idea that was in store for me. So many nights (and weeks...months...) spent alone...worrying (well, obviously all THAT was with good reason!) and trying to adjust to the life of a military spouse. Definitely not something you can prepare for. The funny thing is, I don't regret having that experience. Military wives are by far some of the strongest, most amazing women I have and will ever meet. There's a special bond you form with each other that's so strong and indescribable. They may be scattered across the entire US, but I know that if I need them, they would be there for me in a heartbeat. If it took a few crappy years with Sir D for me to gain that in my life, then so be it. I have such fabulous lifelong friends from that period and I wouldn't trade it for the world. (Plus, if you ever want to travel anywhere odds are you can have a place to stay with one of them!! haha)

See?!?! Here I am looking at the glass half-full...craziness!

Yep, life is good. No one other than myself is more surprised to hear those words come out of my mouth. I survived a super dark time in my life and am coming out the other side a happier and more complete person. Great success!

Thank you, Air Force for these amazing ladies in my life!! photo courtesy of LC :)


  1. I cannot even describe how much I love this post!! Miss you lady - and if you're ever in the mood to visit AK, you know you can always stay with us, of course!!

  2. i love you. and i absolutely cannot wait to see you this weekend. d and i will be leaving asap on thursday. and i am glad we already have your trip to charleston on the books for june. xo.

    you were always better than him. never doubt that.